We’ve probably all suffered around a person that we can nearly feel draining the energy right out of us. This person may be a co-worker, someone you volunteer with, a regular at your job you have to deal with, whoever they may be they are we call “energy vampires” because they suck the life right out of us. Now, sometimes people aren’t even aware they have the attributes of an energy vampire, but some people do this intentionally. So today we’re going to discuss how an energy vampire might act and how you can deal with them. Let’s get started!
(image via: istock)
Signs of an Energy Vampire:
- They love to not take responsibility. No matter what the situation is, they’re always the victim and will tell you they have no idea what they did wrong.
- They are somehow always involved. It doesn’t matter where the drama is, they are right there in the middle of it. (Like, just watch and listen like everybody else?)
- They’ve always, and we repeat: always, have to one-up you. We don’t even need to explain this one, someone probably just popped into everybody’s mind.
- Your problems don’t matter, but theirs are twice as important. Because if your problem actually mattered, then who is going to care about theirs?
- They will take advantage of how nice you are in a heartbeat. You know those friends that you feel super obligated to keep plans with even if the day comes and you’re just not feeling it anymore but you know you’ll have to hear about the canceled plans for days to come? Yeah, that’s an energy vampire.
- They love a good guilt trip.
- They jump at any and every opportunity to criticize you.
- They may even try to intimidate you.
So as you skimmed the signs of an energy vampire someone may have popped into your mind leaving you feeling exhausted at just the thought of them; if not, consider yourself lucky, but be aware of future energy vampires. Now, let’s talk about the best ways to deal with these life suckers.
(image via: istock)
Call ‘Em Like You See ‘Em
Sure, when you meet someone that’s a little out there you may excuse the behavior because you aren’t trying to pass judgment, so instead focus on how you feel after you’re around this person. Do you feel tired? Maybe have a headache? Feeling a little nauseous even? If so, then you’ve encountered an energy vampire and you should proceed with caution.
Limit Contact and Get Those Boundaries Established
The two kind of go hand in hand and both are a little easier said than done but stick with us here. Start small by not agreeing to meet up for coffee, lunch, or weekend trips. If the energy vampire in your life just likes to talk your ear off or it’s someone you can’t totally detach from, let them know before they get too into their own story that you only have X amount of time before you have to ______. And stick to it!
Don’t Get Sucked In and Don’t Give Them Even an Inch
You can’t fix their problems, you can’t fix them, and that’s just that, so don’t become part of the problem because you’re trying to “fix” the problem(s). And don’t shy away from giving them excuses when it comes to hanging out; “I’m not feeling up to it” is a fine reason to go home and watch T.V. Eventually this person will realize they won’t get the attention they so desire from you and they’ll move on. They always do.